The Ultimate Question Of Battery Life, The Universe And Everything

Yes, I'm an Apple Fan Boy.

Yes, I love Apple products.

Yes, I actually use them.

And this last statement is actually the source of my rant as for the last five years, I have been constantly obsessed with the battery life of my iPhone (from V1 to 3G to 3GS to 4 to 4S and finally iPhone 5). Each new iPhone with each new iOS iteration brought more features, less power consumption but more or less the same battery and in the end the same battery life.

What Apple failed to realize is that releasing a less power hungry chip doesn't compensate for the increase in use and functionality when coupled to the same battery.

All the talk about great battery life is just marketing BS to me. The iPhone has great battery life if you don't use it. But isn't the point of having a shiny iPhone to actually use it? What if you're heading to the airport after a long day of work (or actually a short day of work) and realize that your boarding pass stored in Passbook won't be available when you get to the airport because you don't have enough battery left?

Well, that's my life and the following picture is what I fear the most and yet see very often:

Another Worthy Burger in Strasbourg (France)

Every once in a while, fate smiles upon you. As most of you already know, my wife and I founded the "Share-A-Burger" initiative in December 2004 in a genuine attempt to change the world one burger at a time. If you're not already a fan by the way, please like our facebook page immediately.

As of today, we have 479 fans sharing the love of burgers and even better, a restaurant in Strasbourg that serves burgers using our GNU General Public License Burger recipe with only minor modifications. So, do not hesitate to go try it for yourself at Le Catsy's Chez Frieda!

And of course: May The Burger Be With You All!

Behold The NiederBurger

Not content with being the hypest food in France at the moment, the burger is also subject to various Alsatian takes on its recipe.

The French love to do things differently (is that the reason why Steve Jobs would very often refer to France in his keynotes?) and the Alsatian people take pride in setting themselves apart from France. You might ask yourself if that is a good thing in the realm of burgerness and here I come to give you the ultimate answer (which differs from 42): IT IS A GOOD THING.

I had the extreme pleasure of sampling two different Alsatian burgers in less than a week and can only conclude that although they both strayed away from the Classic Burger that I love, they were both excellent and very original. The former is featured in my previous blog post here while the latter is the subject of the post you are reading now (isn't that logic?).

I loved the idea of creating a very tasty and juicy burger using a custom-baked pretzel and crusty and thick patty. The result was absolutely great and I can only advise every single one of you to pay a visit to l'Atelier du Sommelier in Niederbronn-les-Bains (Alsace, France) to try other delicacies (I'm not 100% sure they have the burger on their menu so call in advance should you wish to sample it).

And of course to set things right, my delicious burger was preceded by a fantastic and genuine Caesar salad (in the American sense of the term, not the usual French interpretation of the Caesar salad):

Cosmic Entanglement, Consciousness & Bodily Existence

Witnessing the last moments of existence of a living being only reminds us that our existence, in this world that we call ours, is transient and fragile. Although we spend most of our days not thinking too much about it, we are bound to face this reality from time to time and ultimately at the time of our death. It is, in fact, both appalling and essential that we avoid such concerns on a daily basis for our existence would be otherwise flooded with angst and sorrow.

However, in these moments when we are faced with the vanishing of life, we sometimes, feel that we can grasp a short preview of what our existence and the universe are all made of. Of course, such realizations could arguably be described as vain attempts at dealing with grief. I like to think that, though pointless, these moments can only help our understanding of the universe or whatever that might have a purpose in it.

Does it seem so far-fetched (which religion or philosophy isn't?) to think that our bodily manifestation is nothing more than a mere puppet remotely controlled by our true self emanating from a different plane of existence through some sort of cosmic entanglement?

Death could be conceptualized as the simple action of severing this cosmic connection, disconnecting our true self from our "puppet". I have such a hard time believing that our material existence is the only reality. There has to be a more transcendent explanation than simply accepting our condition as it is.

How can we believe that either there is nothing else than the creation of our consciousness and its destruction at the end of our life? Or that something magical and/or religious is there to explain it all? Can't we theorize something in between? Why wouldn't there be something linking our physical universe to a spiritual one obeying our yet-to-come understanding of science?

Isn't there something transcendent in all creatures able to ask themselves such questions? And by that reasoning, can we reach some sort of partial conclusion that we, or part of us, can exist in so many different planes of existence that our true essence does not vanish but only evolves through multiple states and connections?

Sunday Burger Sunday December 2010 Edition

In my ongoing quest to reach Burger Xanadu, I am proud to present to you tonight's attempt at Burger Heaven! These burgers tasted as good as they looked! I used the usual ingredients: Onion, Tomato, Iceberg Lettuce, Bacon, Ground Meat and Hellmann's Mayonnaise. What actually set these burgers apart was the use of Louisiana Gold Horseradish Pepper Sauce and Gouda cheese. I used the latter in an attempt to add a good dose of absurdity to my recipe just because I will soon connect through Amsterdam on my way to Brazil. What better way to memorize a travel itinerary than with the composition of a hamburger? Encoded in the other ingredients are the date and time of travel, seat reservations and the answer to the question of life, the universe and everything.

Who needs a flash drive when they have a burger?

Sunday Burger Xanadu Sunday

Tonight's attempt at burger Xanadu was 96,66 % successful. I can safely say that the burgers pictured in this post were the best I ever made. They consisted of two slices of melted cheddar cheese, fried bacon, one slice of Buffalo Mozzarella, onion, pickles, one slice of tomato, mayonnaise, two beef and pork patties and either Harissa (a.k.a. the traveling condiment) or Jalapeño mustard.

In my mythical quest of the perfect burger, I believe that I have, so far, managed to elevate my soul and my sauces to new heights. Tonight, I was blessed with a glimpse of the divine and through the fulfillness of my taste buds I was ascended, if only for a fraction of a second, to an alternate plane of existence where the complete knowledge of the universe seemed to be at grasp. Back on earth, my beliefs are now shaken and I'm thinking there must be a God or at least a Burger God.

Note: Forgive the blurry pictures but it seems that such beauty induced tremors in my earthling hands.

101010 - 42 - The Ultimate Answer To All Questions

It is no coincidence that today's date (10/10/10) happens to be a Sunday. It probably holds the answer to all questions. As 101010 converted in binary is 42 and 42 being the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything, if you add to this equation the fact that Sunday is Burger Day for me, I can only conclude, as French humanist Rabelais failed to do so in his Quint Livre that ended with the word "Trinch" in an invitation to find the answer to all questions in wine, that the real answer to all questions and particularly the meaning of life lies within hamburgers!

Can there be anything more beautiful in this world than hamburgers? I don't think so! So, let me introduce you to my latest attempt at Burger Heaven: The Big Awesome Burger (B.A.B.) with the works: designed today and hence holding the answer to all questions.

Note: The answer to all questions is currently in my stomach.

Ode To Absurdism & Numbers

Absurdism refers to the conflict between the human tendency to seek inherent meaning in life and the human inability to find any. I find that true humor lies in the Absurd, at least it is the kind of humor that touches me and lifts me to laughter paradise. I find nothing more exhilarating than The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. Who could have constructed a more articulate and elaborate answer than 42 ? What better way to answer the most important philosophical question than to transport it to a whole different plane of understanding and transcend its answer by expressing it in mathematical language? In a similar way, evil forces and the Anti-Christ are also symbolized in western religions by a number (666) for the lack of possible depiction of such a terrifying entity in traditional language.

Psychotic patients often have a singular relationship with language and some feel more comfortable solving mathematical equations than answering simple questions in plain English.

In conclusion, I believe that the true essence of mankind will only find its Xanadu when, in a gravity defying moment, rappers from all over the world unite and shout together : "Yo, 9.81" instead of "Yo, G."