Summer 2011 Burger Awards

In all modesty, I consider myself the No. 1 hamburger expert in the world. After years of trials and errors, taking pictures of them and tasting them, I believe I have accumulated the knowledge equivalent for Burgers of the Ancient Library of Alexandria. Needless to say, I am more than willing to share my wisdom with the rest of world since, as a cousin of mine recently said to me: "You were a spoiled brat when you were a child and at one point, you decided to become a decent person". I might add that I don't know how long that decent period in my life lasted, probably not more than a few minutes but anyway, the point is that I am willing to share.

Burger joints in the form of restaurants rather than fast-food venues seem to become more and more trendy nowadays. The number five seem to be a burger number since at least 2 chains feature it in their name (5 Napkin Burger and Five guys). So, I naturally decided to include only five of them in my review. In-N-Out Burger would deserve to enter the competition but as they have no restaurants on the east coast, I couldn't sample them on my current trip. I did, however, post an article on my blog not long ago about them.

I am just going to list my selection starting with my least favorite joint to finish with the best, IMHO.

Here comes 5 Napkin Burger:

Their burger was ok but didn't qualify as exceptional. Their ground beef patty is way too thick which makes the burger not juicy enough. Their cheddar is only ok. All in all, a decent burger but not sure I will go back.

The Counter Burger:

Same complaint: when making a 2/3 pounder, why not break it down into two or, even better, three juicy patties in order to make this burger breathe. The cheddar was good, as well as the bacon but I wasn't very impressed.

Five Guys:

Now we're talking Burger magic. Five Guys feature great hamburgers. I, particularly, like their jalapenos in a burger. This was a juicy burger with very good cheddar though it could have been melted a bit more. The buns happened to be too cold though. Five Guys is an excellent burger joint and I will definitely be back!

Bill's Bar and Burger:

Lovely burger, very juicy. Perfect size. They also have great cheese fries, loaded nachos and spicy Margaritas. This place is a must go. It is very close to my favorite burger restaurant featured below.

Shake Shack:

Shake Shack started in 2004 in Madison Square Park in New York and they are growing rapidly. Their burgers reach the Xanadu or, should I say, Xanadu of burgers in my opinion. They are juicy and fresh. The buns are perfect, all the ingredients taste great. I'm having a hard time deciding to go eat at any other place when it comes to burgers as I can't fathom a better burger (besides mine of course, in all modesty again) than theirs. If you haven't tried it yet, just run to their closest location!

Oops! The Burger Gods Did It Again At 231 East St. In Strasbourg (France)

Distinguishing reality from our imagination may be a concern for some philosophers. In fact, I am yet to be proven wrong in my assumption that the entire universe and all beings and things in it are just a product of my imagination. In that same line of thinking, my recent (read: two decade old) but unconditional passion for burgers seems to have led to a spike in Burger Joint creations in my hometown.

As I was almost ready to embrace the fact that the world may not be a holographic projection after all, two great Burger Joints opened up in Strasbourg. Someone please explain me how could that be a coincidence?

The first Burger Joint to open was "Le Pied de Mammouth" and I must say my city really lacked such a place. Its opening seems to have been closely followed by the opening of a second, yet different Burger Joint named: "231 East Street" and located 3 Place Saint Etienne (Tel: +33388169613). The former establishment features huge and original burgers whereas the latter sports classic burgers in a perfect bun with juicy melted cheese. I can't say which one is the best but both places definitely deserve a visit!

The number obsessed in you (and is there any Burger lover who isn't it?) will ask how these burgers rate on the Shake Schackedness scale. So, let me answer this utmost important question: I would grant "Le Pied de Mammouth" a solid 6.65 out of 7 and "231 East St." a 6.66. And for those of you more familiar with the In-N-Out Burger Awesomeness scale, this would translate into 42 for the former and 42.42 for the latter.

As a special bonus to my faithful readers, here is the menu at 231 East St. (courtesy of @DrGGT):

Granted, it is short and reduced to its bare essentials but you have to admit: who wants to hesitate for hours between 20 different Burgers when they crave for melted cheddar, perfectly cooked patties, lettuce, tomato and mayo in a bun? In this day and increasingly complicated age, do we really need more options than these classic three: Hamburger, Cheeseburger and Bacon Cheeseburger? Although this menu features a salad which might scare some of you away (and frankly shocked me when I saw it), I think they did a great job at simplifying things.


Enjoy it!

Burger Apocalypse

I think it was Plato that once said (or could it be Ronald McDonald?): "In case of a burger apocalypse, we would thank God for club sandwiches". Well, here's proof he was right!

I, personally, hold these recipes to be self evident that all club sandwiches & burgers are not created equal.

The (Update: Former) Best Hamburger In Strasbourg (France)

Without any doubt the best hamburger in Strasbourg can be found in the picture above and IRL (well, almost) at the location disclosed below:

Soul Meat
(For some unknown reason, you will only find their contact information in the yellow pages if you look for "Diable Bleu")

Update as of July 8, 2011: this place doesn't serve the best hamburgers in town anymore. For the best hamburgers, go to "Le Pied de Mammouth" or "231 East St."

The Most Quintessential Word: Sliders

It is clear to me that "Sliders" is the most quintessential word as it relates to both hamburgers and alternate universes. I can't think of any other word to better represent the essence of the universe and the best available food on earth.

My Testament Of Faith

I am a true believer in the power of hamburgers. The History Of Hamburgers is my sacred book. Burger King is my temple. Ronald Mc Donald is my guide. Join me in my faith!

The Beauty Of Food Porn

I love to take pictures of food in the wild, i.e. without too much preparation or emphasis on perfection. That is the way it should be done for Beauty lies in the moment. To me, pictures of food surrounded by crumbs on a dirty plate are no more than an attempt at capturing the true essence of what we are as intelligent beings. This food, whether it be hamburgers or cheeseburgers (both being the essential bricks of matter in our universe), ends up in our cells and eventually becomes us. My pictures might be shocking and even qualify as "Food Porn" but they are real. So, if you continue to read this blog, consider this post as a warning and expect a lot more of those in the future.